I’ve interviewed thousands of women. As a Matchmaker, it’s my job to meet droves of women and get a sense of who they are and what they’re looking for. I find out more from them in 5 minutes than you would on 5 dates. Most women think they know what they want, but they really don’t. If you ask a woman what she’s looking for in a man, she’ll tell you she wants someone tall, dark, and handsome. But if you look at her relationship history, you’ll see that’s not always true.

Men are visual and fall in love through their eyes. They’re shallow and superficial. Sorry guys, you know it’s the truth. However, women fall in love through their ears. We care more about the whole package. We value a man’s personality and how he treats us. I’m here to tell you that looks aren’t that important to all women. Most women want more than a great looking guy. Read on to see what women REALLY want!

1. Be Kind and Caring

Women want a man who is kind and caring. We want someone to come home to at the end of the day who is our best friend. Women want a partner; an equal. Above all, we want a gentleman. Women want to date someone who makes them feel fabulous.

2. Brains, Brains, Brains

Intelligence is sexy. Women are captivated by smart men. Whether it’s informing us about the newest restaurant opening or teaching us something we didn’t know about baseball, we want to date someone we can learn from.  We enjoy feeling enlightened.

3. Have A Sense of Humor

Being funny makes you more attractive to women. There’s no science to it, it’s just a fact. 100 percent of women appreciate a man who is witty. If you can make a woman laugh, she’ll almost always think you’re awesome.

4. Exude Confidence

Women like men who are confident. When you’re sure of yourself, and your actions show that, women are naturally drawn to you. Women are attracted to men who know they’re great.

5. Be Charismatic

In my dictionary, charisma is defined as having swagger, being spunky, possessing a certain je ne sais crois, or my personal favorite, not seeming vanilla-like. Whichever definition you prefer, all women love a man who is charming. When you have a big personality, women find you irresistible.

6. Practice Balance

Leading a balanced lifestyle is important. Women enjoy dating a man who can do it all. We want to date someone who can prioritize his job, family, friends, and a relationship. We’re drawn to men who make time for us and show us that we’re an important part of their life.

7. Show You’re A Good Listener

A man who is a good listener is a true catch. Because women are more emotional than men, we love to share. We can talk for hours. We have tons of stories to tell and we want you to listen to all of them. If you can listen to a woman, and I mean genuinely listen, she’ll be impressed.

8. Display Thoughtfulness

Women are enticed by thoughtful men. Being thoughtful doesn’t mean whisking us away to Miami on a third date. Although we’d certainly love that, it isn’t necessary! Being thoughtful means showing us that you care. If we mention that we love a certain restaurant, surprise us and plan a date there. If we say that we love a particular flower, bring us flowers on the next date. If we tell you that we’re eager to see a specific movie or play, get tickets and take us. A man who’s considerate is very sexy.

9. Go With The Flow

We want to date someone we can bring anywhere. If we’re at a business dinner at Per Se, we want to date a man who can go with the flow and “be fancy.” When clients invite us to their box seats at a sports game, we want to date someone who can keep up with the lingo. I won’t give you ten more examples because hopefully you get the point. We enjoy dating men who can be comfortable in any situation.

10. Be Presentable

Being put together and looking presentable is essential. Women want to date a man who is well dressed. A nice outfit can make you so much more attractive. Personally, I love a man in a nice suit. If you’re well dressed and put together, you’re showing the world that you value yourself and how you look.

At the end of the day, women want to fall in love. We want to date someone who makes us feel special and important.